The pain is real.
I trained Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday, then again today (Saturday). By Wednesday evening, I was struggling to walk. It wasn’t just the ankle either. My calf on the other leg was completely done after walking up and down 500 stairs and taking the brunt of the impact.
I may also have pushed a little hard on Wednesday with standing sprints on the bike. I vaguely recall the doctor suggesting I should probably avoid those too, but naturally, I didn’t remember that until afterwards.
You live, you learn.
Today’s session was a little more sensible: normal seated sprint training on the bike followed by weights. I may even attempt some yoga tomorrow to round out the week if I’m feeling up to it.
Overall, though, not a bad week.
The usual challenges came with being away from home. There are definitely positives and negatives to that. Constantly being around people absolutely drains my social battery, training drains my brain power, and I’ve never been a huge fan of travelling. On the upside, I didn’t have to cook for two days, and a break from the usual routine is sometimes exactly what I need.
So far, the gym comeback is feeling pretty good. I’m not experiencing the same level of overwhelming fatigue that I have in the past. There are probably a number of reasons for that. The training style is different, the intensity is lower, I’ve cut out the booze, and I’ve had some benzo-assisted help in the sleep department. Accurately apportioning causation would require a level of scientific rigour that frankly isn’t happening right now, but whatever the reason, I’m taking it as a win.
I returned home on Thursday evening to find one very unwell little man and one very swollen ankle waiting for me. As a result, I spent my final day of reduced hours working from home.
Monday is the real test. I’m supposed to be back to full-time hours and full duties, so it’ll be interesting to see how much my body, brain, and general tolerance for life can handle.
Right now, though, I mostly want a nap.
In fact, writing this is taking up valuable nap time, so I’m going to skip the nitty-gritty details and get myself organised for the trip down the road to Nanadom.
Week one complete. I’ve survived. Barely.
Stats:
- HRV: This is currently sitting at 30ms. There have been some really good nights, up to 38ms, but still some less than ideal at 27ms. Still not great, but I think I’m starting to see some improvement slowly. Again, the nighty-night tablets may be assisting with these too.
- Sleep Score: My average sleep score is 80, which is not bad—means I’m getting a good balance of light, deep, and REM sleep, even if my body is struggling to recover overnight.
- Workouts logged: 4 workouts since Monday. Each time pushing my heart rate to the late 150s, which is early zone 4ish roughly. I’ve also had the stairs to meander, which was an additional physical challenge this week if not a formal workout.
- Steps: Have been around 5,000 on average most days.
- Energy (7/10): Still tracking pretty well overall, despite the gym. Energy has been up and down as usual, but not bottoming out, which is good.
- Motivation (7/10): Fortunately, I am typically pretty motivated to get to the gym so this hasn’t been too much of a challenge. It’s the moderating myself that is more challenging.
- Anxiety (1/10): None really, just work shit, which is more like an annoying itch rather than anxiety as such.
Irritability (8/10): I’m perimenopausal, which is effectively medical speak for slightly psychotic. My hormones still fluctuate in something of a cycle and it’s like being a teenager again and having no control over my emotions or behaviours at certain points. So yep, this week, I was tearfully looking forward to being reunited with my family after 2 nights away, but less than 24 hours later I was losing my mind over something the kids did or didn’t do. It’s a rollercoaster.- General all-round (7/10): Not bad for the chaos that is my life with all the ups and downs currently.
Things I Know but Apparently Needed to Learn Again
Listen to the bloody doctor (and the physio, and my frontal lobe). Pushing too hard too fast is not going to work. I’m currently sitting with an ice pack on my foot to try and bring the swelling down, which is occurring more frequently than I would like to acknowledge. I am still struggling to find the balance between pushing hard enough to make progress but not so hard I go backwards. It’s a fine line.
Finding that sweet spot between progress and pain is clearly going to take some practice. But despite the swollen ankle, the stairs, and the emotional rollercoaster, I’m still standing and so are the kids (mostly). Week one is in done. I’m going to take this ice pack, go get that nap, and trust that my frontal lobe will actually show up to work on Monday.